What an year it has been for our family....my last post has been an eulogy for my uncle, Rammavayya and this one is for my grandmother, Smt Kilaru Annapura Devi who passed away on Dec 13th, 2011. Needless to say, it has been a rough few months for us, but I don't want to make this post a downer and want to try and commemorate my grandmother and celebrate her life.
She has been a very important, influencing and contributing chapter in my life and I can say confidently, in the lives of many others in our family.
My grandmother, Smt Kilaru Annapurna Devi, true to her name (Annapurna is the Hindu Goddess of nourishment) has always been the caretaker of the family. Kilaru Annapurna Devi to the world, but Annamma (technically Ammamma - Amma's amma - mother's mother, but we call her Annamma - probably because she played the role of Amma to our brother- Anna) to me and many others. As people from far and near got to know the news of her passing away, they started contacting us and remembering her and it is amazing how all of them universally remember her as a hard-working, strong, resilient, care-taker who always put others first and quietly assumed the various roles that others needed her to.
When life threw curve balls at her, she showed her resilience and each time drew strength from the added responsibilities she took on due the circumstances. Having lost her husband, my grandfather (Tatagaru) at a very young age of 38, she drew strength from her responsibility to raise her young children. Then later, she faced the most dreaded loss of her elder daughter and quietly assumed the role of the mother to her grandchildren. Eventhough she was already at an age when a lot of her contemporaries were enjoying retired life and responsibility-free fun-time with their grandkids, our Annamma took on the responsibility of raising her grandchildren as their mother and more than fulfilled this role of hers. At the same time, due to the health issues that my mother faced, she even tried to extend herself to care for us as and when needed. All of this she did without ever complaining or feeling sorry for herself. She made us feel special as though we were the world for her.
To me, my Annamma has been a symbol of warmth and comfort. We always looked forward to visiting her home in Vijayawada during our holidays only to be pampered and spoilt by her. She was the quiet organizer at home who somehow knew all our little whims and fancies and quietly just fulfilled them for us. We looked forward to her coming to our home so we could sleep with her at night and listen to her tell us about her childhood and about her times with our grandfather. She often told us how her memories of the times with Tatagaru were enough for her to live even after his passing. We knew our grandfather only through her recollections of him and she made sure all of us, his grandchildren knew him and are also proud of our lineage and our grandfather, Sri. Kilaru Gangadhara Rao.
To me, my Annamma has been a symbol of strength and support. She was always part of any occasion big or small in our family and she was not just a part, but the one that we relied heavily on for either advice, physical help or emotional support. She was always there to celebrate with us, support us through difficult times and worry for us and with us. She always worried about us and tried to think two steps ahead to arrange things for us.
To me, my Annamma has been a symbol of selflessness and continuous accommodation. I have never ever seen her put herself first, she has always been accommodating and thinking of others first. I have never seen her even enjoy her favorite fruit, Mango without checking on everyone else in the house first. She was very adaptive to new places and conditions and open-minded to learn and appreciate varied cultures and customs as she welcomed grand-daughters-in-law and grand-sons-in-law from various cultures and beliefs.
To me, my Annamma has also been a symbol of wisdom. Her wisdom comes not from any formal education, but from her life. She was an avid reader and strongly believed God is within us, especially in our good deeds and good intentions. She was amazingly broad minded and worldly wise for her age and times and always willing to learn from her life experiences. She taught us how to make most of our life experiences, how to be strong and how to accept any situation and move right on without spending too much time brooding over it.
In short, I feel very lucky to have had a grandmother like Annamma who was and is a second mother to me. Although, I miss her terribly and miss talking to her, miss her pampering and fussing, I am happy thinking she is in a better place now, reunited with her loved ones.
Annamma, after all that you have done for all of us and everyone around you throughout your life, you deserve nothing short of a heavenly life now, and I hope that is what God has in store for you now.
She has been a very important, influencing and contributing chapter in my life and I can say confidently, in the lives of many others in our family.
My grandmother, Smt Kilaru Annapurna Devi, true to her name (Annapurna is the Hindu Goddess of nourishment) has always been the caretaker of the family. Kilaru Annapurna Devi to the world, but Annamma (technically Ammamma - Amma's amma - mother's mother, but we call her Annamma - probably because she played the role of Amma to our brother- Anna) to me and many others. As people from far and near got to know the news of her passing away, they started contacting us and remembering her and it is amazing how all of them universally remember her as a hard-working, strong, resilient, care-taker who always put others first and quietly assumed the various roles that others needed her to.
When life threw curve balls at her, she showed her resilience and each time drew strength from the added responsibilities she took on due the circumstances. Having lost her husband, my grandfather (Tatagaru) at a very young age of 38, she drew strength from her responsibility to raise her young children. Then later, she faced the most dreaded loss of her elder daughter and quietly assumed the role of the mother to her grandchildren. Eventhough she was already at an age when a lot of her contemporaries were enjoying retired life and responsibility-free fun-time with their grandkids, our Annamma took on the responsibility of raising her grandchildren as their mother and more than fulfilled this role of hers. At the same time, due to the health issues that my mother faced, she even tried to extend herself to care for us as and when needed. All of this she did without ever complaining or feeling sorry for herself. She made us feel special as though we were the world for her.
To me, my Annamma has been a symbol of warmth and comfort. We always looked forward to visiting her home in Vijayawada during our holidays only to be pampered and spoilt by her. She was the quiet organizer at home who somehow knew all our little whims and fancies and quietly just fulfilled them for us. We looked forward to her coming to our home so we could sleep with her at night and listen to her tell us about her childhood and about her times with our grandfather. She often told us how her memories of the times with Tatagaru were enough for her to live even after his passing. We knew our grandfather only through her recollections of him and she made sure all of us, his grandchildren knew him and are also proud of our lineage and our grandfather, Sri. Kilaru Gangadhara Rao.
To me, my Annamma has been a symbol of strength and support. She was always part of any occasion big or small in our family and she was not just a part, but the one that we relied heavily on for either advice, physical help or emotional support. She was always there to celebrate with us, support us through difficult times and worry for us and with us. She always worried about us and tried to think two steps ahead to arrange things for us.
To me, my Annamma has been a symbol of selflessness and continuous accommodation. I have never ever seen her put herself first, she has always been accommodating and thinking of others first. I have never seen her even enjoy her favorite fruit, Mango without checking on everyone else in the house first. She was very adaptive to new places and conditions and open-minded to learn and appreciate varied cultures and customs as she welcomed grand-daughters-in-law and grand-sons-in-law from various cultures and beliefs.
To me, my Annamma has also been a symbol of wisdom. Her wisdom comes not from any formal education, but from her life. She was an avid reader and strongly believed God is within us, especially in our good deeds and good intentions. She was amazingly broad minded and worldly wise for her age and times and always willing to learn from her life experiences. She taught us how to make most of our life experiences, how to be strong and how to accept any situation and move right on without spending too much time brooding over it.
In short, I feel very lucky to have had a grandmother like Annamma who was and is a second mother to me. Although, I miss her terribly and miss talking to her, miss her pampering and fussing, I am happy thinking she is in a better place now, reunited with her loved ones.
Annamma, after all that you have done for all of us and everyone around you throughout your life, you deserve nothing short of a heavenly life now, and I hope that is what God has in store for you now.
4 comments:
Beautifully said
Beautifuuly said Mickey
You not only captured everything Annamma was but you did it very beautifully....thank you Mikkakka
How true, touching and written so wonderfully micky. Thank you
Anita
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